Ⅰ 寫了一個博士英文留學自薦信，水平太差，太中國化 求高手相助，使其像一篇地道的留學自薦信，急用，在線等
你的英文水平很不錯。作為一封自薦信，完全可以。
建議在細節方面再仔細檢查一下，如
標點：在but also之前最好有逗號；
時態：畢業時間在 2011，應該用將來時；
in my life of graate, based on the solid foundation on electronics, I have the chance to ...
應該用 had
另外，life 的用法也值得商榷，不如用 college life, 或 after graation 等等。
I had also won several scholarships 時態應該用現在完成時 I have ...
資料庫課題名稱中的首字母應該大寫。
另外，However, I have my weakness of being impetuous. 或許可以再斟酌一下。
例如，可改為：
I know I have some shortcomings such as being impetuous at improper time, and I am trying to correct it.
總之，建議在細節上仔細檢查一下。
祝你順利！