Ⅰ 写了一个博士英文留学自荐信，水平太差，太中国化 求高手相助，使其像一篇地道的留学自荐信，急用，在线等
你的英文水平很不错。作为一封自荐信，完全可以。
建议在细节方面再仔细检查一下，如
标点：在but also之前最好有逗号；
时态：毕业时间在 2011，应该用将来时；
in my life of graate, based on the solid foundation on electronics, I have the chance to ...
应该用 had
另外，life 的用法也值得商榷，不如用 college life, 或 after graation 等等。
I had also won several scholarships 时态应该用现在完成时 I have ...
数据库课题名称中的首字母应该大写。
另外，However, I have my weakness of being impetuous. 或许可以再斟酌一下。
例如，可改为：
I know I have some shortcomings such as being impetuous at improper time, and I am trying to correct it.
总之，建议在细节上仔细检查一下。
祝你顺利！